October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Posted by Tamara Wilson in Home and Family on October 1, 2008 | one response

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In October 1981 was the beginning of “Day of Unity”. The National Coalition against Domestic Violence grew from a daylong event to a week long event. To where it is today to extend the whole month of October because this is a very important topic for all of us to be aware of.

Most of us have heard about domestic violence however many don’t truly know what it is. In the simplest terms domestic violence that happens in relationships where one of the partners tries to gain control and power over the other. Often this is referred to as ‘Spousal abuse’, The victims of domestic violence can be of any age, religion, or gender.

Often times it is thought that this is an issue about anger. In reality the abuser may never do any physical harm to anyone other than their spouse. They often also wait until there is no one around to witness this before any of the abuse or bad talking starts. A main issue in situations like this is control. One partner wants to have complete control over their spouse and they’ll do anything to accomplish that goal.
Here are some of the strategies that an abusive spouse may use:

Dominance: The abuser needs to feel like they are in charge, making all decisions of the household and expect you to obey them without saying anything. Often times you may be treated as if you were their servant or child.
Humiliation: They will use derogatory talk to make you feel bad about yourself. If they convince you that you’re not worth loving and they’re doing you a favor by staying with you, you’ll be less likely to leave.
Isolation: They want to maintain your dependence upon them so they cut you off from the outside world. You may not be able to meet or talk to friends or family, to the point where you are not allowed to leave the house without them being with you.
Threats: Abusive relationships use this tactic to keep their family from leaving. They may threaten to call child services or may even say they’ll kill themselves if the other partner leaves.

Intimidation: Abusers use intimidation to scare you into submission. They may slam something in front of you, destroy your things, or hurt your family pet.
Denial and blame: Abusers will make excuses for their behavior or blame their victim for it.
Guilt: What usually occurs after an abusive episode is that the abuser feels guilty, but not because of what they’ve done. They may apologize but are more worried about facing the consequences of their actions.

Domestic violence is something no one wants to endure. Unfortunately this is happening al the time. That is the reason Domestic Violence Awareness Month was instituted. The hope is that by making more people aware of the violence it will stop.