Posted by
Tamara Wilson in
Parenting on
January 31, 2009 |
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Being the parent of a teen is tough, its especially tough if your teen has low self-esteem. Many times we as parents begin to wonder what can we do to help our teens, Or perhaps catch the low self esteem before it starts. Often times it seems difficult to get them to talk or let alone share their deep thoughts with you.
While your teenager may not always think highly of themselves, especially if they’re being teased by their peers. You may want to find ways of raising your teen’s self-esteem through the roof. Here are some ways you can do just that:
- Stop what you’re doing and pay attention to them when they are speaking to you. Yes, there are times it may be inconvenient to do so, but taking that time away from what you’re doing and concentrating solely on them can have such a positive impact on your teen’s self-esteem. It lets them know that you truly feel they are important.
- In the same vein as paying attention to your teen, listen to what they’re telling you. Let them know that you are actually hearing them by repeating some of what they’ve said to you back to them. You don’t have to do this with every sentence, but try it every so often rather than merely answering “uh huh” every once in a while.
- While you’re listening, don’t forget to ask questions. What better way is there to prove that you hear what they’re saying than to ask questions pertaining to what they’ve said? This will also give you an opportunity to learn something else about your teen that you may not have known.
- Praise your teen for the things they do right. There will be plenty of opportunities to bump heads with your teen, so make an effort to find them doing something right, and sincerely praise them when you do.
- Acknowledge your teen’s feelings, especially for your teenage sons. Teens may have problems expressing themselves adequately, so do what you can to encourage them to talk even if they have problems expressing their feelings.
- Never criticize your teen. If you get upset and must dole out punishment, make an effort to punish your teen’s behavior rather than your teen.
- Try to share some of your teen’s interests with them. This doesn’t mean that you have to be intimately involved in every detail of their lives, but you may want to begin working on a shared hobby together.
- Don’t belittle your teen if they seem insecure or fearful about the future. There are so many unknowns that your teen will be facing, it’s no wonder they may be insecure. You also don’t want to laugh at your teen or tease them about their insecurities. Doing so will damage their self-esteem rather than improving it.
- Talk to them about their future. Ask them what they would like to do. Do they want to attend college? Do everything you can to help that desire become a reality.
- Nurture your teen’s special talents. If your teen is interested in a sport or playing an interest, encourage them to go for it.
Loving and encouraging your teen has such a positive affect. It gives them the confidence they need to try new things and to look forward to the future. You may find that your encouragement is what’s needed to raise your teen’s self-esteem through the roof.
Need More ideas?
Here are two guides to help you reconnect with your teen, so you can help them with the rocky road of being a teenager.
1. Real Life Guidance to Understanding Your Teen shows you how to accept what you can and cannot control in your teen’s life, how to cope with mood swings, keeping the lines of communication open.
2. Real Life Guidance to Helping Your Teen in High School includes practical suggestions to help your child find his/her identity, avoid bullies, handle peer pressure and more.
Grab them both to be armed with the easy-to-follow advice at your fingertips. They’re available for instant download, which means you can get the help you need any day of the week, even if it’s the middle of the night.
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For a widower like me, this is a great help… raising a child (especially teens) is not a joke after all… and I’m thankful that I am not struggling… With the help of some tips like this, I am doing well.. Thanks
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Believe or not but your advices help a lot,
I had a very low self-esteem when being a teenager, and my parents hardly could do anything with it,
Your very welcome. I have two teen boys I know how difficult this time is, Plus when they are going through things it seems like yesterday I was there and I try to do what I wanted done and what was done for me.